Wow! Someone's been reading my posts!

I wrote a post a while back called "The Party of None" (Read Here). Now we have this headline: "A movement begins: Vote 'no' on Election Day"

This bloke has stolen my idea and written a book on it! The nerve! Still, It's nice to know that there are others out there as brilliant (and as humble) as I am!

Seriously, though, I think I'm gonna have to read this one:

The author, Joseph Farah states:

He's right on the mark with that statement and I could not agree more. For too long we have been choosing half-abled candidates. Follow the link above, or click here and read the whole article.

Campaing 2008 Spoof #2

Campaingn 2008 spoof #2....It's Johnnys turn:

2008 Campaign Spoof #1

Seeing as how yesterday I ventured into to foray of politics I may as well continue. I present here, today, my first installment in a series of "just for fun" candidate spoofs. What better outlet for my political frustrations? Oh, yes, I will be picking on each cadidate, each in turn, as the spirit moves me, and posting them on an irregular basis.

My first is a spoof on a popular Target stores ad and Obama is my victim:

The Party of None

It is by now well known, or at least it should be, that my opinion of the candidates for President of the U.S. is less than stellar. It has been hard for me, and it still is, to find anything positive to say about either of them. Let's face it, they both suck. It quite often is that way when you're scraping the bottom of the barrel. The only reason we have the 2 we have is because they were disliked the least of all those presented for nomination.

Neither of them deserve my vote for President and neither of them are going to get it. No one is. Oh, I'll still vote but it will be a write-in vote and the write-in will line read "None of the Above"

I think ALL ballots in all States should have this as a choice, None of the Above.

See, the way ballots are counted now each candidate is allocated a percentage of the total votes cast. If you don't vote, you don't count. If you don't like either candidate what choice do you really have but to choose the lesser of the two evils, close your eyes, hold your breath and vote for the one you like the least? Sure, You don't feel good about it, kinda feel like you've sold your soul and, unlike primary delegates, none of the candidates paid you for their vote. Cheap bastards any-way!

Scenario:

So, lets say our scenario-election is over. Candidate X get 49% of the votes and Candidate Y gets 51% of the votes. A traditional News media result would look something like this:

• Candidate X = 49%
• Candidate Y = 51%

Now lets say in our little scenario-election the total percentage of registered/eligible voters that voted was 60%. What of the other 40%?

For the sake of simplicity lets say there were 100,000 registered/eligible voters. So our 60% of those eligible registered voters who voted would equal 60,000 votes.

If Candidate X got 49% of the votes cast that would be 29,400 votes

If Candidate Y got 51% that would equal 30'600 votes.

Now, you remember the remainder of those eligible/registered voters who did not vote because they did not like either candidate? Their total uncast votes would equal 40,000 votes. If they were to be counted as "None of the Above" votes who would have the majority? Yup. It's the 40,000 who didn't vote. It would totally change the election results and they would then look something like this:

• Candidate X = 29.4%
• Candidate Y = 30.6%
• None of the Above = 40%

That's a margin that would be considered a landslide! Sadly,they don't count cause in the current scheme they didn't vote. The major parties, with the aide of the media, ignore those that did not vote...IF you don't vote, you don't count remember which is kinda ironic because both parties ALWAYS want everything to count. Yeah. Right.

The result of this little scenario, however unlikely, it's the 40% that are the actual winners. Yet, the person who will actually occupy the position in the White House winner would be Candidate Y. This person would then have to win over and really work hard for and take into consideration the "Party of None" in thier decision making process' and this could possibly present and/or create a dramatic shifts in government policies.

I say we give those who do not like any candidate a choice and have, by default on every states election ballot, the choice of "None of the Above" for President. I think it would be interesting, telling and a far more revealing indicator of voter dissent than any third party loser candidate running. It would allow everyone a true choice, possibly draw more voters to the polls and they would finally count too! And that's where I think things could possibly be very interesting.

4th of July, Computers & The Beach

Ah. Monday again. Is this getting to be a weekly thing now? H-mmm, gotta work on that. There are always good stories to tell and, you know, I quite frequently have these all sorted out in my head, what I want to jot down and share with the world, all 9 of you out there, but they have a tendency to get caught up in all the clutter and voices in my head in my head that keep asking me if there is room for just one more and thus get drowned out....

In the past I have bemoaned the fact that there are some people that just should not have computers. It's like mixing oil and water. Fortunately I am not lumped into that category. No, I'm not trying to brag here, I'm just stating a fact... cause I'm the one people call when they have computer problems (Mom I love you very-very much!) and its hard, oh so hard, to maintain ones patience and composure when you get a phone call from someone (i'm not naming any names either...Mom) stating that they were just trying to help out a friend with their computer. They thought they were doing the right thing and, well, they screwed the thing up and can you please, please-PLEASE fix it for me? even though I'm like eleventy-billion miles away from them cause they are in "The Land of Snow and Cheese*".

Then pile on top of all that the pressure from my kids, who are all decked out in bathing-suits, goggles and swim-rings and sun-screen, cause you were just about to depart for a day at the beach and not just any beach but the best darned beach in the whole world (see pic below) when the aforementioned desperate phone call comes through....yeah, just a little pressure there...and I'd rather be at the beach too because sitting there (again see pic below) beats sitting in front of a computer...(or doing other sundry chores at home)....

Now, I should also give credit where credit is due (are you listening Mom??) As far as computer literacy is concerned, she has more than most people I know and, hey, at least she tries....Of course much of what she knows is thanks to me, again, I'm not bragging, just stating the facts. So, yes she does pretty darned good for an old fart with all this new fangled technology of the digital era, and that's saying alot. She can navigate Windows XP pretty effectively, knows how to upload, download, heck, she's even got a facebook account! She's a pretty hip Grandma according to my kids and they're right....now that being said there is a difference between knowing and, well, knowing...if you know what I mean....

Now, the great difficulty of fixing a computer that is eleventy-billion miles away in the land of snow and cheese (in Racine, Wisconsin and I'm in Holland, MI in the Water-Winter Wonderland), even if it is only across the lake and in reality only 50 or so miles away as the crow flies (230+ miles by car) is 1) it's a long-long swim and by the time one would get there their arms would be very tired, 2) it's a long drive and would be a colossal waste of a beautiful day not to mention the cost of fuel there and back. So, whats one to do? Why, Fix it remotely of course.

One of the great features of Windows (And you Mac lovers can just shushh) is the remote assistance feature it offers whereupon those in PC distress (Mom) can summon help from the computer gods (Me..again not bragging just stating the facts) and allow a person to take over said computer in distress and fix it. It really is quite amazing technology. It was quite a sight, me hunkered by my home PC surrounded by my beach-wear clad coconut and aloe vera smelling daughters who, though patient, are growing increasingly frustrated with their Dad because they are not a the beach yet 'cause Dad really wants to be the hero (am duty bound the wife says...great, more pressure!) for all involved....

Once I was granted permission to "take over" the ailing computer in the Land of Snow and Cheese I went to work...Once the problem was isolated I was able to download and re-install the missing software and, while that was being done, I proceeded to "tweak" things out and streamline the system thus making the computer faster and thus more efficient. Damn, I'm good! (again, not bragging cause it's really not bragging if it's true right?) It really is cool to be able to sit at my computer, from anywhere in the world, and remotely take over and assist another users computer. Oh! The things we do for those we love.

All-in-all it took me about 45 minutes to an hour and the patience of Job. (not job as in work, but Job (long "O") the dude from the Old Testament) The kids and I then ske-daddled to the beach, (and it really is the BEST beach in the whole darn world and the only one that I know of where the sand squeaks under your feet when you walk on it) which is why I now have this nagging-burning sensation on my shoulders, back and belly from decadant, prolonged exposure to the sun and surf and only using SPF 8. Good call huh?

We called Mom up from said beach in Holland, Michigan and, as we stood on the shore line with the refreshing lake water and waves lapping out feet, we waved at her vigorously from our side of "The pond" and she waved back at us and blew kisses to the kids...she was a little difficult to make out from our side of the lake 50-some-odd miles away, what with the sun glinting off the water and all, but we're certain we saw her nonetheless.

*"Land of Snow and Chesse" description un-ashamedly pilferd and stolen from TKW...yeah, no originality there at all on my part

Monday-Monday...

Getting back into the daily grind is difficult at best after a couple days off fly fishing. The old adage of needing a vacation from my vacation rings quite true!

The fishing last week, the night fishing, was great. The HEX were on, but just starting. Wednesday and Thursday nights fishing was productive and we had a great time! Friday night...well, mother nature had different plans for us. Rain. Buckets and buckets of rain! The river rose almost 8 inches in the course of a few hours and that pretty much sealed the deal for the evening. In spite of that, it was a great day. Rain, storms, etc, are one of those things we have no control over so we might as well make the best of those situations. And we did. We sat on the camper steps, smoked a cigar, sipped some bourbon, had some pleasant conservation and marveled at the show mother nature provided. At times, it just don't get any better than that! It's all a matter of perspective.

Perspective was something I had to keep in mind yesterday afternoon (Monday) whereupon I found out my oldest had been in a wreck with the car. She rear-ended a Jeep liberty and the car got smacked up pretty good. The Jeep, nary a scratch! Cars can be repaired or replaced and as difficult it is to shrug off an inci-dent, you have to do it. Yes,yes, she's O.K. Just a bruised ego and a 90 dollar civil infraction. I, like most fathers, was trying to find the humor in the situation and thought about giving her the business as fathers are want to do. You know, maybe she was trying to read a bumper sticker or saw a cute boy.... However I mustered up what little will power I had and refrained from doing so...I think I'll just save it for a rainy day! For the life of me I still can't figure out why she called her Mom after the acci-dent and not her Dad....I mean, really, What's up with that? So, the Car:

It was funny though, when I did get home, it took her about 1/2 hour or so to finally come and see her Dad. I gave her a big hug, asked her if she was O.K. and left it at that. Mondays. Yeah.

15 years ago today my middle daughter was born. Now this was one that did not want to make an entrance into the world on her own so we forced her to via induced labor. That was in interesting time. We were told that once labor was induced it would take a while, 4 hours or so, for contractions to start. Yeah...right....more like 20 minutes. It was nothing gradual either. It was more like WHAM! Hard labor! 2 hours later a baby.

Talk about intense....for a period of time things were progressing at a dizzying speed and at one point I felt that way too. I plopped myself down into a chair, apparently looking pretty pale and,well, not sot hot. Everything in the room suddenly stopped and all eyes, doctors, nurses, the wife, were on me. "You O.K?" came the question? "Yeah...I'mjus fine....just get that kid out...I'll be fine" I replied....apparently I nearly passed out...but didn't...pretty tough arn't I?? It was quite the event...and here we are, 15 years later and sometimes I still wanna pass out! In retrospect that was a cakewalk compared to the "teen-age daughter" years we are now, currently, forced to endure... lemme tell ya.

My daughters tell me I'm clueless and that I don't understand girls....come to think of it my wife says that too...I plead ignorance and I, u-mmm, think I'm O.K. with that most of the time!